Don’t Get Mad, Just Get Even
Jack’s mother ran into the bedroom when she heard him scream and found his two-year-old sister pulling his hair. She gently released the little girl’s grip and said comfortingly to Jack, “There, there. She didn’t mean it. She doesn’t know that hurts.” Mom was barely out of the room when the little girl screamed. Rushing back in, she said, “What happened?” “She knows now,” little Jack explained.
Sweet Revenge
Abe Lemmons was asked if he was bitter at Texas Athletic Director Deloss Dodds who fired him as the Longhorn’s basketball coach. He replied, “Not at all, but I plan to buy a glass-bottomed car so I can watch the look on his face when I run over him.”
True Clout
Three burly fellows on huge motorcycles pulled up to a highway cafe where a truck driver, just a little guy, was perched on a stool quietly eating his lunch. As the three fellows came in, they spotted him, grabbed his food away from him and laughed in his face. The truck driver said nothing. He got up, paid for his food, and walked out. One of the three cyclists, unhappy that they hadn’t succeeded in provoking the little man into a fight, commented to the waitress: “Boy, he sure wasn’t much of a man, was he?” The waitress replied, “Well, I guess not.” Then, looking out the window, she added, “I guess he’s not much of a truck driver, either. He just ran over three motorcycles.”
Toys for Revenge
If thine enemy wrong thee, buy each of his children a drum. –Old Chinese Proverb