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Old Professions

Posted on December 24, 2022April 29, 2023 by Alan Holden
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Old _______ never die—they just ____________.

Housewives, wash away.

Janitors, kick the bucket.

FBI Agents, get fed up.

Cardiologists, become disheartened.

Golfers, lose their drive.

Baseball players, strike out.

Football players, fumble away.

Hockey players, lose their puck.

Tailors, divested.

Detectives, dissolved.

Orchestra leaders, become disbanded.

Musicians, become disconcerted.

Chiropractors, become disjointed.

Politicians, become devoted.

Clerks, become defiled.

Elks, become dislodged.

Dentists, lost their pull.

Math teachers, subtract.

Magazine editors, expire.

School principals, lost their faculties.

Skiers, go downhill.

Mountain climbers, peak out.

Gluttons, waist away.

Garbage collectors, fail to pick up.

Locksmiths, lose their keys.

Insurance salesmen, lost their premiums.

Bankers, lost their balance.

Welders, blaze away.

Electricians, lost their shock.

Accountants, lost their figures.

Mailmen, lost their zip.

Bank tellers, yield to maturity.

Dictators, fly the coup.

Parade leaders, float away.

Chairpersons, go through the motions.

Travel agents, never return.

Bakers, fail to rise.

Pilots, fly away.

Jewelers, lose the time.

Photographers, never develop.

Carpenters, lost their pound.

Taxi drivers, lost their drive.

TV repairmen, lost their picture.

Joggers, run down.

Funeral directors, go underground.

Bus drivers, transfer.

Truckers, their drive.

Bowlers, end up in the gutter.

Singers, lose their tune.

Doctors, lose their patients.

Boxers, lose their punch.

Painters, lose their color.

Florists, wither away.

Lawyers, lose their will.

Nurses, lose their pulse.

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