Child Rearing
In her biography, Margaret Mead tells of her grandma who was a wonderful storyteller and who had a “set of priceless, individually tailored anecdotes with which American grandparents of her day brought up children.”
There was the story of little boys who had been taught absolute, quick obedience. One day when they were out on the prairie, their father shouted, “Fall down on your faces!” They did, and the terrible prairie fire swept over them and they weren’t hurt. There was also the story of three boys at school, each of whom received a cake sent from home. One hoarded his, and the mice ate it; one ate all of his, and he got sick; and who do you think had the best time? Why, of course, the one who shared his cake with his friends. Then there was the little boy who ran away from home and stayed away all day. When he came home after supper, he found the family sitting around the fire and nobody said a word. Not a word. Finally, he couldn’t stand it anymore and said, “Well, I see you have the same old cat!”
Crime and Punishment
A group of kindergarten children visited the local police station and viewed the pictures of the ten most-wanted men. One child pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photograph of the wanted person. The policeman replied that it was.
The youngster inquired, “Well, why didn’t you keep him when you took his picture?”
It’s Your Dad
Two boys were walking home from church and sharing their reflections on the lesson. They had been studying the temptation of Christ in the wilderness. Little Peter said to his friend John, “Do you believe that stuff about the Devil? Do you think there really is a Devil?” John looked at him and said, “Nah, it’s just like Santa Claus—it’s your dad.”
Sonship
A promising young executive quit his job and before leaving, stopped in to say good-bye to the boss. The boss lamented, “I’m sorry to see you go. Actually, you’ve been like a son to me—sassy, impatient, demanding, and loud.”
Picture of God
A little boy was working hard on a drawing and his daddy asked him what he was doing. The little boy said, “Drawing a picture of God.” His daddy said, “You can’t do that, honey. Nobody knows what God looks like.” But the little boy was undeterred and continued to draw. He looked at his picture with satisfaction and said very matter-of-factly, “They will in a few minutes.”
Unpredictable
You never know how far up the wall they’re going to drive you.
School Prayer
Whether legal or not, kids have been praying in school for as long as anyone can remember.
We prayed that the school would burn down the night before the math exams. We prayed the teacher would break her leg on the way to our house to talk to Mom. We prayed that Dad would not notice the D on our report card. We prayed the music teacher would not ask us to sing the scale. We prayed the most popular classmate would ask us to the prom. We prayed the bus carrying the rival team would go into the ditch. We prayed for good marks so we could go to summer camp. We prayed for laryngitis so we would not have to dress like a tree and recite that silly Arbor Day poem. Oh, yes, we prayed in school.
Not Molded
Children are not things to be molded but are people to be unfolded.
Spelling Integrity
At a national spelling contest in Washington, an incident occurred that made me feel good—and made me wonder. In the fourth round of the contest, Rosalie Elliot, then an eleven-year-old from South Carolina, was asked to spell avowal. In her soft Southern accent she spelled it. But did the seventh grader use an a or an e as the next to last letter? The judges couldn’t decide. For several minutes, they listened to tape recording playbacks, but the critical letter was accent-blurred. Chief Judge John Lloyd finally put the question to the only person who knew the answer, “Was the letter an a or was it an e?” he asked Rosalie. Surrounded by whispering young spellers, she knew by now the correct spelling of the word. Without hesitating, she replied she had misspelled it. She walked from the stage.
The entire audience stood and applauded, including half a hundred newspaper reporters, one of whom was heard to remark that Judge Lloyd had put quite a burden on an eleven-year-old. Rosalie rated a hand and it must have been a heartwarming and proud moment for her parents. The thing that makes me wonder, however, was the apparent feeling on the part of so many that the issue might have been in doubt and that honesty might have bowed to temptation. Have we in this age stopped taking honesty for granted, even from our children?
A Modern Father’s Perspective
A cartoon in Forbes magazine shows a modern father talking with his young boy, giving him some fatherly perspective: “Remember, son, these are your tax-free years. Make the most of them.”
Teaching or Violence?
At the hockey game, I was rinkside when one of the players rammed into the boards. As he struggled to regain his balance, he gasped, “There must be an easier way to make a living.” “I’ll trade jobs,” I retorted. “What do you do?” he asked. “I teach sixth grade,” “Forget it,” he said, and was gone.
Fresh and Spoiled
If a growing object is both fresh and spoiled at the same time, the chances are it’s a child.
Absent Creed
Each Sunday morning as they began class, the fifth graders would line up and recite their one section of the creed in the order that it was written. That teaching method worked well and went on about four months, until one Sunday. They began the class the same way. The first girl as usual recited her line flawlessly: “I believe in God the Father Almighty, maker of heaven and earth.” The second, a boy, stood up and said his sentence: “I believe in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord.” But then silence descended over the class. Finally, one girl, who felt she had discovered the problem, stood up and loudly said, “I’m sorry, sir, but the boy who believes in the Holy Ghost is absent today!”
Get the Story Straight
A group of four-year-olds were gathered in a Sunday school class in Chattanooga. Their enthusiastic teacher looked at the class and asked this question: “Does anyone know what today is?” A little four-year-old girl held up her finger and said, “Yes, today is Palm Sunday.” The teacher exclaimed, “That’s fantastic! That’s wonderful! Now does anyone know what next Sunday is?” The same little girl held up her finger and said, “Yes, next Sunday is Easter Sunday.” Once again the teacher said, “That’s fantastic! Now, does anyone know what makes next Sunday Easter?” The same little girl responded and said, “Yes, next Sunday is Easter because Jesus rose from the grave.” But before the teacher could congratulate her, she continued, “But if He sees His shadow, He has to go back in for seven weeks.”
Becoming Possible
The teacher asked her class what each wanted to become when they grew up. “President.” “A fireman.” “A teacher.” One by one they answered until it came Billy’s turn. The teacher asked, “Billy, what do you want to be when you grow up?” “Possible,” Billy responded. “Possible?” asked the teacher. “Yes,” Billy said, “my mom is always telling me I’m impossible. When I grow up, I want to become possible.”
It’s Tough to Be a Saint
Young Brian, age five, had been told the story of the “pillar-monk,” Symeon the Stylite, in Sunday school. He was captivated by this godly man’s approach to seeking God’s approval. Early Monday morning, he decided to imitate Symeon. He placed the kitchen stool on top of the table and climbed to her perilous perch and began his journey toward sainthood. Mother, entering the kitchen, interrupted his holy pilgrimage by explaining, “Brian, get down off that stool before you break your neck.” Brian complied, but went storming from the room announcing, “You can’t even become a saint in your own home!”
Ten Commandments for Parents
- My hands are small; please don’t expect perfection whenever I make a bed, draw a picture, or throw a ball. My legs are short; slow down so that I can keep up with you.
- My eyes have not seen the world as yours have; let me explore it safely; don’t restrict me unnecessarily.
- Housework will always be there; I’m little only for a short time. Take time to explain things to me about this wonderful world, and do so willingly.
- My feelings are tender; don’t nag me all day long (you would not want to be nagged for your inquisitiveness). Treat me as you would like to be treated.
- I am a special gift from God; treasure me as God intended you to do—holding me accountable for my actions, giving me guidelines to live by, and disciplining me in a loving manner.
- I need your encouragement (but not your empty praise) to grow. Go easy on the criticism; remember, you can criticize the things I do without criticizing me.
- Give me the freedom to make decisions concerning myself. Permit me to fail, so that I can learn from my mistakes. Then someday I’ll be prepared to make the decisions life will require of me.
- Don’t do things over for me; that makes me feel that my efforts didn’t measure up to your expectations. I know it’s hard, but don’t compare me with my brother or my sister.
- Don’t be afraid to leave for a weekend together. Kids need vacations from parents, and parents need vacation from kids. Besides, it’s a great way to show us kids that your marriage is something special.
- Take me to Sunday school and church regularly, setting a good example for me to follow. I enjoy learning more about God. –Kevin Leman
Children or Wealth?
A person with six children is better satisfied than a person with $6 million.
Reason: The man with $6 million wants more.
Make Up Your Mind
My eight-year-old son, Noah, was discussing parent problems with his little friend. Of course, they had a lot of complaints. Dustin was overheard grumbling, “First they teach you to talk, then they teach you to walk, and as soon as you do it, it’s ‘Sit down and shut up!’”
Genetic Law
Insanity is hereditary. You can get it from your children. –Sam Levenson
Loss of the Beloved Child
Excerpt from an interview with the late Joe Bayly of David C. Cook Publishing Company and his wife, Mary Lou. The Baylys lost three children.
Joe: We are stewards of the children God gives us, and at any time God can interrupt that stewardship.
Mary Lou: Although this isn’t something you can say to somebody else who has just lost a child or is in the process of losing a child, it’s still true that if Jesus Christ is the Creator and has planned in intricate detail each of His creations—especially His own people—then if we love one of them, how much more He must. How can we compare our love to His? Our assignment from God is to simply prepare our children as a skilled craftsman fashions an arrow. But you always have to remember that the arrows may not always be shot out into adulthood.
A Child in Heaven
We have eight children. And they’re all living: one’s in heaven and seven are on earth. –Father of missionary Chet Bitterman, killed by terrorists in Colombia in March 1981.
Consider the Children
A distinguished elderly gentleman, walking through the toy department, stopped to admire a toy train. It whistled, belched smoke, deposited milk cans, in fact did virtually everything a real freight train does. After looking at it for some time, he finally said, “I’ll take it. Please have it wrapped.” The clerk said, “Fine, I’m sure your grandson will love it.” The elderly gentleman said thoughtfully, “That’s right. Maybe you’d better give me two of them.”
Once in a Lifetime
When I was around thirteen and my brother was ten, Father promised to take us to the circus. But at lunch there was a phone call. Some urgent business required his attention downtown. My brother and I braced ourselves for the disappointment. Then we heard him say, “No, I won’t be down. It will have to wait.” When he came back to the table, Mother smiled and said, “The circus keeps coming back, you know.” “I know,” said Father, “but childhood doesn’t.” –Arthur Gordon
Primitive?
One of the first things one notices about any backward country is that the children obey their parents.
A Teacher’s Prayer
Lord, give me wisdom to discover in each child his spark of divinity, the gift that You have given him, and through love and guidance, nurture this spark into a glowing flame.
Let me not favor any one child at the expense of others. Let all be equally worthy of my devotion without regard to their intelligence, their religion, their race, or their wealth.
Let me teach a love of America by keeping ever alive her commitment to the greatest good for the greatest number in the belief that these children are Your greatest good and Your greatest number.
Lord, help! They’re coming into the room right now, all thirty-two of them. Any small miracle will be greatly appreciated. Amen.
Childish Virtue
One thing you can say for small children—they don’t go around showing off pictures of their grandparents.
Just Like Family
The secretary was leaving to get married and the boss gave her a big hug and a kiss. “You’ve been like a daughter to me—insolent, surly, unappreciative.”
Test Drive
When my brother and his wife were considering adopting some children, they first took two little boys into their home as foster children to see how they would all relate to each other before moving toward adoption. I was explaining this to my wife’s twelve-year-old daughter, who responded spontaneously: “Gee, that’s like test-driving a little kid.”